My career soared
The freshly sober will evangelically promote the message “life is rosy now”. They’re not lying, because initially that is true. In sober circles they call it the “pink cloud” – the high you feel when, post-withdrawal stage, life seems brilliant.
A few weeks after being dry I was buzzing. Up at 6am, sweating it out on a turbo trainer in my mate’s garage. I did the London to Brighton bike ride, then London to Paris. I lost over 19kg (down from 133kg) and I felt unstoppable.
What’s more, I’d relatively quickly gone from being “Dave the Carpet” on a makeover TV show, to straight-talking “Sober Dave” on Instagram. People related to the fact I wasn’t some smug influencer running a daily 10k; I was just a big tattooed bloke telling it like it was. The year after I launched my podcast One For The Road, which also did surprisingly well, then came the book and it snowballed. I had a new purpose.
Yet my personal life was in tatters
But while all that was taking off, behind closed doors my personal life was slowly falling apart. Admittedly, there were already cracks in my six-year-old marriage when I was drinking. Midlife marriages can be complicated; I had four step-children and my ex-wife had undergone cancer – more than once. I can’t have been easy to live with, and fundamentally we were cut from different cloth. Stopping drinking wasn’t a miraculous cure-all. My issues (a complicated childhood, a turbulent relationship which led to me constantly getting absolutely plastered, sleeping rough for four nights on the beach and culminated in the pain of my mum’s death in 2018) were all still there.
Once sober I started seeing life in full 4K, realising what I did and didn’t want. So by 2022 my marriage was over and we’d separated.
I packed my bags and left our London house, we both knew it was for the best. But it was unsettling, especially without alcohol as my trusty crutch any more, and with all the financial stress divorce brings. After moving around in-between rentals and hotels for the next year or so, I eventually bought my own place in the East Midlands. But I didn’t have many friends there, so apart from work (I now coach people online as well as give talks in schools, companies and for the Blue Light professions) life could sometimes feel fragile. I’d take Rosie, my dog, out for long, lonely walks thinking about life. But here’s the truth – while I’d remained sober throughout an emotional roller-coaster, I’d secretly swapped the booze addiction for a sugar one.
No one admits that swapping one addiction for another is incredibly common. Whether it’s food (like me) or shopping, work, exercise, social media – we all reach for something, people I meet in recovery circles all say the same thing. We’re all a bunch of hypocrites because we’re all human!
I swapped my beer gut for a food belly
Portion control was a problem, I thought I was being healthy having a weighty bowl of granola and Greek yoghurt in the morning, but I’d ladle on so much honey that breakfast alone was probably 700 calories. The bowl would weigh a tonne. Or I’d eat cinnamon buns, or wholemeal toast but slathered with peanut butter.
Lunch might be four chicken thighs with jacket potato and salad (and I’d polish my halo), then I’d tuck into a huge steak and chips for dinner – enough to feed an entire rugby team. I wasn’t a bad cook, it wasn’t like I’d left all that to my wife during marriage, but I was naive about portion sizes and nutrition.
In the evenings, I’d come home from a long day talking to people about alcohol addiction and scoff a family-sized apple crumble with vast amounts of ice cream, nipping back for more until – ah, f*** it – I’d finish the lot. “I’m allowed treats, I’ve stopped boozing,” I’d tell myself. But just like my drinking had stopped being something sociable by the end, so too had my eating. It was something I’d privately binge for a dopamine hit, along with a huge dollop of shame.
I ballooned back up to 125kg through comfort eating, yet all the while I was out there giving talks, helping people get sober. I felt like a greedy fraud.
I didn’t think it was very “manly” to diet, as us men generally don’t talk about it, but I tried that Zoe patch thing, tracking my blood sugar, logging everything in the app. After three months I got bored and thought “sod it – I’ll be a happy fat, sober influencer” and own it in my big elasticated trackie bottoms pulling them up to my man boobs!
But I wasn’t happy, I’d found my divorce quite traumatic, and even though I’d had a relationship after that, I hit a wall last spring, feeling a 59-year-old fat bastard.
Plus I was a mess physically, I was out of breath climbing the stairs and my gut was by then hanging over my trousers.
Finding the right diet
So I was properly fed up and looking for ways to lose weight when I came across a lovely lady on Instagram, who explained how when we quit drinking – and sugar cravings start to take over – it’s very common for people like me to gain weight gain. And with that comes a higher risk of diabetes with other health problems.
Sugar, you see, isn’t just “empty calories” but in fact a substance that drives cravings, addiction and long-term health issues in itself. More than just the waistline, too much sugar destroys our liver, heart, brain, and pancreas, too. I started focusing on stabilising blood sugar and getting insulin under control – which I realised was exactly what I needed.
Signing up to what’s known as The Human Being diet was brutal at the start. I kicked off with two days only eating vegetables and drinking Epsom salts, so let’s just say the floodgates opened – I felt like I’d shed 5st on the loo. No one talks about that part!
The good thing about it is the rules are clear: three meals a day (always combining a protein with vegetables) and a five-hour fast between meals to maintain healthy blood sugar levels. This means more stable energy, diminished cravings and better moods (because we all know being hungry makes us grumpy).
They seemed like the tiniest portions known to man. No oil, no sugar (including fake sugar and sweeteners) and no grains. You’re not allowed alcohol either initially, but that wasn’t a hardship for me. In fact, once you’ve gone through the extreme discipline of quitting booze, you’ve got the mental strength it takes for this kind of diet discipline. I followed the rules to the letter, with “no negotiating, no excuses” the same mantra I’d had for quitting booze.
And it was effective quickly, I dropped over 6kg in 16 days. Within a few months, I’d lost more than 25kg and was down to 89.5kg. I could see my jawline again. I bought proper suits, stopped hiding behind baggy black jumpers. I started to feel proud when I walked into a room.
By late autumn in 2024, I was at 89.5kg which for my 6ft height I’m happy with, even if I go up and down a kilogram or two.
Looking ahead
Now, I follow the plan but I’m not a robot. During the week I eat clean: salad and boiled eggs for breakfast, tuna and avocado on rye for lunch. No processed rubbish, no refined sugar. But I’m human. At the weekend I’ll have a cinnamon bun. It’s about balance. I’m not punishing myself, just not taking the mick either.
Sobriety taught me this: I needed to stop running away. From booze, from food, from myself. Now, I do what people call “sitting with my feelings”. I love my work coaching people through addiction and hosting a weekly sober group. I’m up at 5am, in bed by 10pm.
As I’m single now I’ve no idea how it will be if I re-enter the dating scene. I’m certainly never drinking again but if I go out for dinner I can treat myself to some nice peppercorn sauce with my steak at least. Otherwise can you imagine me on a date? “I’ll have a lime soda and your finest salad please and absolutely no pudding” – that won’t quite cut it.
Right now I live a clean, quiet, grounded life. When people come and tell me they’d still be drinking if it wasn’t for me it genuinely makes me so happy. I’m alive, I’ve got purpose and I’m trim. I love it.
I turn 61 this month. Life is full of ups and downs, but I’m in the right place to manage them these days.
What Dave ate before
Breakfast: Huge portion of granola, with fruit, honey and yoghurt
Lunch: Chicken thighs, jacket potato and salad (again enough for four people)
Dinner: 8 sausages and mash with peas and gravy, followed by apple pie and ice cream
Snacks: Toast slathered with peanut butter mid morning, then in the afternoon biscuits or cake
Drinks: Coke, milky coffees and teas all day
What Dave eats now
Breakfast: 2 boiled eggs and salad
Lunch: Tuna, red onion on rye bread
Dinner: Small portion chicken breast and mixed veg, with no pudding apart from on my treat meal on a Saturday, which could be fruit and Greek yoghurt
Snacks: None, just 3 meals a day
Drinks: Black coffee with meals water in between
How to quit a sugar addiction
Blood sugar highs and lows disrupt brain function, which can make cravings, mood swings and fatigue feel unbearable, according to Petronella Ravenshear, creator of the Human Being Diet (HBD). “Restoring healthy blood sugar balance is key to weight loss and to breaking sugar (and alcohol) addiction,” she says. Here’s how to do it:
Start the day with hydration
Drink ½ a litre of water first thing on waking and another 1.5l before lunch, adding unsweetened and unflavoured electrolyte drops for energy if needed. This will help clear out toxins from the fat cells that have broken down overnight.
Eat breakfast within an hour of waking up
Waiting too long between meals can allow blood sugar to drop too low, making sugar cravings more likely.
Stick to three meals a day
In every meal, including breakfast, always combine one protein food, (e.g. fish, eggs, chicken or tofu) with a mixture of vegetables. Meals like eggs and salmon with avocado and tomato work well.
No Snacking – try a pinch of salt instead
Eating in between meals is not allowed, as there needs to be a five-hour fast, with water only, between meals. This helps maintain blood sugar levels which will diminish cravings and improve mood and energy levels.
If you’re feeling weak or light-headed during the fasting windows, put a pinch of sea salt on your tongue.
Food to strictly avoid
Grains, sugar, honey, sweeteners, alcohol and fruit juice, eliminate all fruit other than an apple, to be eaten with with one meal a day.
The drinks allowed
In between meals stick with only water, or black unsweetened coffee or tea with meals. When drinking with meals, adding apple cider vinegar helps with our blood sugar balance.
Avoid intense exercise
Don’t attempt any cardio (for at least the first 16 days) to minimise cortisol (the stress hormone) which raises blood sugar
Bathe in Epsom salts
Before bed, add a pound of Epsom salts to a hot bath, then soak for at least 10 minutes, dry off and hop straight into bed. There’s a theory these can draw out toxins – while that’s unproven, they do aid falling asleep because of the magnesium.
Prioritise sleep
Get as much rest as you possibly can – it’s when we’re asleep that we’re fat-burning and detoxing. And sleep deprivation makes us more like to crave sugar and carbs.
As told to Susanna Galton
